Professor Yaffle

Three Men In A Boat, by Jerome K Jerome

2006-09-09T09:23:00.000Z

In 1889, JKJ and two friends ("to say nothing of the dog"), suffering a mild hypochondria, decide it would be bracing to row up the Thames in a skiff, from Kingston to Oxford. This, then, is the very funny account of said trip (drawn from actual exploits on the river), as well as frequent side-tracking into whatever other topic occurs to him. The chapters are prefaced with teasers such as "I forget that I am steering", "George buys a banjo", "The steam launch - useful recipes for annoying and hindering it" or "Strange disappearance of Harris and a pie". It's a short book (only 169 pages) and a good read - I shall certainly look out for the sequel, Three Men on the Bummel (about a cycling tour in Germany), which I'd never heard of before.

Tanglewreck, by Jeanette Winterson

2006-09-04T10:49:00.000Z

"...the Universe is not solid. The Universe is energy and information. Solid objects are only representations and manifestations of information and energy. Master that and you have mastered everything."

JW's first book for children, and thoroughly vetted by her goddaughters, this is a marvellous quest through space and time with goodly chunks of philosophy thrown in for good measure. At times reminiscent of Phillip Pullman, and at others Neil Gaiman's Neverwhere, Tanglewreck is however very much its own book.

The young heroine Silver is pitted agaist sinister guardians and scientists in her quest for the Timekeeper, a mysterious alchemist's watch that has the power to quell the time tornados the world is experiencing, as it runs out of time in the same manner as oil or coal. Tanglewreck has popes, pirates, incompetent henchmen, Schrodinger's cat and even Stephen Hawking makes an appearance or two. Loved it, definitely recommend it, and will certainly be reading it again.

"Attica", by Garry Kilworth

2006-08-11T13:37:00.000Z

What lurks in the dark corners of the attic? What would happen if, crossing the rafters, you found you could go on and on, into an unknown roof-scape country of hat-stand trees, strange villagers driving sewing machine cars, scissor birds and murderous shop-window dummies? Three children (and Neslon, the "three-cornered cat"), sent into the attic of their new home to look for the landlord's old watch, are about to find out...

This is a great book, I bought it on the strength of the blurb on the back, and I wasn't disappointed. (I also thought I'd read another of his books years ago, but I can't track it down, so I must have been thinking of someone else. Still, worked out ok!). A really original children's fantasy quest book, the characters are well drawn and believable and the landscape is vividly painted for you. I did feel a vague sense of 'cop out' when it came to dealing with the question of passing time and their return though, but not enough to spoil any enjoyment of it. If you like well written children's fantasy, I thoroughly recommend this!

"The Ragwitch", Garth Nix

2006-07-29T13:40:00.000Z

Loved the Old Kingdom series, so was quite chuffed when I found this in the library - it's a fantasy quest that feels similar to The Hounds of the Morrigan, or The Weirdstone of Brisingamen.

Julia finds a sinister ragdoll on the beach in Australia, which turns out to be the banished form of an evil witchqueen from another world. Absorbing Julia into herself she escapes back to her own world - followed by Julia's brother Paul, intent on rescue.

The book swaps back and forth between the two points of view as they battle the Ragwitch - Julia trapped within her memories, aided by the people she meets there, and Paul, travelling through the world outside, on a quest to meet the four elements and form a spell that will kill the Ragwitch and save the kingdom - but in doing so, will he kill his sister as well...?

The book does take a couple of chapters to get into its stride, but once it gets going I didn't want to put it down. The only other slight downside is that the ending feels very rushed and almost a bit of a cop-out. You see the number of remaining pages dwindling and think how the heck is everything going to be resolved - usually the case where it all ends on a cliffhanger and there's another entire book to come - but here it's all wrapped up in a couple of pages, which after all the build up feels a bit of a let down. Having said that, the characters and creatures are as well realised as in the Old Kingdom books and I would definitely recommend it as a cracking bit of children's fantasy.

"The Fourth Bear", by Jasper Fforde

2006-07-18T20:50:00.000Z

This is the follow-up to last year's The Big Over Easy, and while it didn't strike me on first reading as quite as funny as Fforde's others, that still makes it funnier than the majority of things out there.

DCI Jack Spratt and DS Mary Mary of the Nursery Crime Division are looking into a series of greenhouse explosions, seeming linked to gardeners in the field of extreme cucumber growing and also the disappearance of Goldilocks, supporter of the controversial 'right to arm bears' movement and possibly mixed up in illegal porridge dealing. Jack's got other things on his mind too - Punch and Judy have moved in next door, Dorian Gray has sold him a distinctly odd car, and he's got to prove his sanity to a psychiatric review...

Definitely recommended!

"Mayday!" by Clive Cussler

2006-07-15T08:24:00.000Z

This is one of the earliest (1973) Dirk Pitt adventures, and was also published as The Mediterranean Caper, which I think I prefer. This is an early version of Dirk - not unrecognisable, but certainly a woman-slappin', smokin', cussin' version, who's still referred to as Major.

It's a brief enough read compared to the later volumes, but the ingredients are all here - Al, Rudi, the Admiral - check. Threat to the world (tonnes of smuggled heroin about to flood the States) - check. Beautiful female foil - check. Classic car - check. Evil foreign baddie - check.

It doesn't feel overly dated, but oddly it's the way everyone smokes continuously throughout that sets it firmly in its time. It feels very Bond-ish, with the villain in his clifftop lair, deadly labyrinth and airborne dogfights - later books will establish Pitt more firmly in his own milieu, but it's an entertaining enough read - certainly enjoyed it more than Vixen 03 .

Danse Macabre, by LK Hamilton

2006-07-07T20:21:00.000Z

The latest of the Anita Blake, Vampire Hunter series, and amazingly, it has even less plot than the last one. I really, really wonder why I keep buying these - it's just tawdry sex and arguments from beginning to end. I like the characters, which is why, but I so wish she would give them something to do other than bitch and nibble at each other.

This installment is a hefty 483 pages, of which the actual slice of action/plot takes up only 63. I'm not kidding. Those 63 aren't bad, featuring a vampire dance troupe touring the States with freedom to pass through various Masters' territories, lead by a creature who may or may not be the original Merlin, and may never have been human in the first place, attempting to take over the assembled powers at the end of tour bash. It's well done, and could have taken up a lot more of the book. Or the book could have been a lot shorter and tighter, like the earlier ones. But no, it's all dealt with in short order and we're back to the sex, and the arguments, and the arguments about sex.

And STILL no bloody Edward.

Blood Fever, Charlie Higson

2006-02-21T11:28:00.000Z

This is the second of Higson's 'Young Bond' series, following last year's Silverfin, and this one's even better.

It's got a bit of a misleading cover ("death is contagious"), I assumed it was going to be about a plague of some sort, whereas it actually involves a worldwide crime syndicate, Sardinian bandits, sinister schoolmasters and a mysterious Mithras-worshipping cult.

James ships out to Sardinia during the holidays on a school run archaeological expedition, before jumping ship and going to stay with his cousin elsewhere on the island. He meets Count Ugo Carnifex, obsessed with cleanliness and ancient Rome, and before long the action switches to the mountains, with all the 30's based excitement and scrapes you'd expect. Midnight raids, rope based window rescues, underwater swims, stowing away on railway carriages, boxing honour matches. Like Enid Blyton for the 21st century really (ie with actual killing. Quite a lot of it, really).

The supporting characters are good too, especially the names in traditional Bond style: the bandit girl Vendetta, feisty schoolgirl Amy Goodenough, pirate Zoltan the Magyar.

Highly recommended, for a bit of escapist derring do.

Lirael, Garth Nix

2006-02-21T11:07:00.000Z

First a word of warning - unlike Sabriel, the first book in the Old Kingdom series, this is not a stand alone volume, so make sure you've got the third (Abhorsen) waiting in the wings, because you will want to keep reading straight through (whereas I now have to go and buy it).

Set initially fourteen and then eighteen years after the events in Sabriel, it centres on Lirael, a daughter of the Clayr, the seers that live under a glacier in the far north. Saddened by the fact that she alone of all her peers has not yet come of age with the ability to See the possible futures, Lirael is given a job in the Library. This is a huge place, spiralling down in to the mountain, and full of dangers and treasures and knowledge locked behind various doors. With her companion the Disreputable Dog, Lirael sets about exploring, aided by her ability with Charter Magic.

At the same time, dark forces are once again threatening the Kingdom, and with the King and the Abhorsen away in neighbouring Ancelstierre, it is down to Prince Sameth, the reluctant Abhorsen-in-Waiting to try to keep events in check. Joined by Lirael (with newfound abilities to walk in Death as a Remembrancer), they approach the part of the Kingdom controlled by the Necromancer and hidden to the Sight of the Clayr. And that's where you have to go and buy the next one. Frankly, I'm off now.

This book was a definite case of can't-put-down, I read it in about two days and recommend it unhesitatingly (but read Sabriel first). And of all the books I've ever read, I think the place I would most like to go, and live, and work, is the Library of the Clayr.

Piratica II - Return to Parrot Island, by Tanith Lee

2006-02-17T13:18:00.000Z

This is a great book, and not just for kids. The sequel to Piratica, where, in a parallel England, the teenage Art(emisia) Blastside took up piracy on the high seas, this sees her happliy married to Felix Phoenix (think Orlando Bloom in Pirates of the Caribbean) and living the life of a lady. Before long however, events conspire to take her back to sea, with both old crew and new, as a government sanctioned priveteer. Her plan is to instead go looking for the Treasured Isle, with its maps showing all the buried treasure in the world (found and then lost in the first book). Things go awry however, she is seperated from Felix and then wrecked on the coast of Africa, before eventually ending up in the midst of a naval battle. She must contend with a lost Egyptian tribe, old enemies thought to be dead, and the ghostly ship of Mary Hell...

This was definitely a book I didn't want to put down - some of Tanith Lee's writing can go a bit wiggy on you, but her children's stuff is generally excellent and this certainly was. Similar in style to her Wolf Tower books (also recommended), the Piratica books are great fun - and unresolved elements of this story (such as the rebuilding of the ship to secret pirated blueprints) suggest there will be more to come - I certainly hope so.

Shadowmancer, GP Taylor

2006-02-13T16:41:00.000Z

I really wanted to like this book. It sounded good, had good reviews, and indeed started off promisingly enough, as a tale of smugglers and black magic, children pitted against an evil vicar, and a mysterious object of power from Africa. However, about half way throuhg it goes all Old Testament on your ass. All types of magic, witches, tarot cards and so on are pronounced to be irredeemably evil, the devil (who turns up towads the end) claims he uses the name of earth mother to trap the unwary, and the only chance of salvation anyone has is through their acceptance of the "one true god".

The characters never become especially three dimensional: Raphah (which I never could decide how to pronounce, so that annoyed me all the way through), hot on the trail of a missing religious object from Africa spends most of his time being offended at how eighteenth century villagers react to an irritatingly sanctimonious black guy appearing in their midst. The evil vicar never seems to be consistent in his character and when dealing with the sumggler Jacon Crane there seem to be huge leaps between his intent in different scenes, without it being clear whether he's being treacherous or just confused.

The end comes suddenly, to the extent that as the number of pages left dwindled I was wondering if it would actually be left on a cliffhanger and I'd have to struggle through another book. However, no, it all ends in a rather rushed scene in Whitby, but leaving lots of things unresolved (such as the fate of the Azimuth, who Crane had sworn to help, Thomas' mother, Kate's father, or the people of Baytown whose houses have just fallen into the sea).

While he does work in some nice elements of mythology, both local Yorkshire and Eastern Christian, all it really suceeds in delivering is a plot full of holes and characters that never become more than symbols for religious allegory that's rammed home with the subtlety of a poker. I won't be bothering with any others by him.

The River of Adventure, Enid Blyton

2006-02-07T18:14:00.000Z

The Adventure series was always my favourite Enid Blyton set, and I've just got hold of a 1956 hardback copy of this one with the original Stuart Tresillian line drawings, which are lovely and bring back a lot of childhood memories. People say that Blyton books are too dated or racist or sexist for a 'modern' audience, and cherry-pick quotes as appropriate, but personally I feel that's a load of rubbish if you actually read them through. Ok, so a few bits date them, such as "the air hostess brought them a tray full of most delicious food. 'Why is the food always so super on a plane'..." - and very possibly: "Philip was giving his snake an airing". Ok, so in the 1950's people's minds probably weren't as filthy as they are now (well, mine, anyway)...

The River of Adventure sees the four children (Phillip, Jack, Dinah and Lucy-Ann) and Kiki the parrot off to foreign parts and warmer climes as they convalesce from the flu - additionally acting as a smokescreen for Bill, who's keeping an eye on shady character Raya Uma for the British government. Needless to say, the baddies intervene, the children get separated from the grown-ups and fall headlong into adventure, including snakes, waterfalls, underground tunnels and hidden treasure...

Enid Blyton books give good treasure, always of suitably spectacular proportions, and can also be counted on for plucky children and a variety of exciting scrapes and well described locations. Recommended for readers of any age that want a couple of hours' escapism.

Night Probe! by Clive Cussler

2006-02-01T18:20:00.001Z

No, it's not as dodgy as it sounds, although the title's not explained until nearly the end and the exclamation mark was probably a bit uneccessary. This isn't the most dramatic of the books, lacking as it does any actual threat to the whole world. In fact the tension here is between the USA and Canada/Britain, so reading it as a Brit there's a bizarre sense of divided loyalties. Especially as one of Pitt's adversaries is a certain British secret agent recalled from retirement - which I think would have worked a lot better without the final-scene namecheck for the thick members of the audience who hadn't worked it out yet.

Anyway, the upshot is, a treaty involving Canada was drawn up between the USA and Britain a hundred or so years ago, and both copies promptly lost, one on a sunken liner and one on a train that plunged into a river. Pitt has to find a readable copy before a forthcoming presidential address, and, as usual, various people want to stop him. There's a bit of a political sub-plot involving Canadian separatists too, but it doesn't really get in the way.

I liked this one, actually, even though there was no great peril and you couldn't help feeling you didn't actually care if he found it or not. There's a good bit with a ghost train too...

Anansi Boys, by Neil Gaiman

2006-02-01T18:20:00.000Z

"If you need to see him, tell a spider."

Mr Nancy is dead, and in the act of death has managed to embarrass his son Fat Charlie just one more time. Travelling back to America for the wake, he learns of a brother he didn't know he had, and when he turns up, it's Fat Charlie's life that turns upside down. To make him leave again, he strikes a bargain with the Bird woman in return for the Anansi bloodline, and that, of course, is when things really start to go wrong.

It's in the same vein as American Gods, although not a direct follow-on: the old gods, the animal gods, walking as men, and affecting the world, and the stories that make the world. It's got humour, horror, romance, crime and a goodly dollop of magic and myth. Recommended - even if you don't like spiders.

It also comes with 'extras' - including a deleted scene, scans of the notebook he wrote it in, and reading group discussion questions. And I especially liked the chapter headings - "In which Fat Charlie does several things for the first time" and so on.

Vixen 03, by Clive Cussler

2006-01-22T11:03:00.000Z

Quite a short book by his later standards, set in the 80's (but written in the 70's) Vixen 03 feels very dated in terms of race and gender relations. Pitt's girlfriend is pretty wet, and disappears entirely in the latter part of the book, to the extent that he never even appears to tell her that he's discovered her father was murdered!

Vixen 03 is a plane with a deadly cargo that was lost and forgotten in a Colorado mountain lake. Rediscovered by Pitt (whose character is also still pretty thin at this point), it transpires that some of the weapons are missing, and through a series of unlikely coincidences end up in the middle of a South African race war and an attack on America. Cue another race against time to save the world, amidst lots of explosions!

I didn't particularly like the first half of this book, but it builds to a satisfyingly exciting climax. So - manly men doing manly things. Probably with stubble. Not the best, but it gets better.

Metro Girl, by Janet Evanovich

2006-01-22T10:40:00.000Z

This is the first in a new series featuring Alex(andra) Barnaby - and if you like the Stephanie Plum books it's fairly safe to say that you'll like this, as just change the names and it could be one. That's not meant to be a criticism either. If anything, this is even frothier, it's great fun and very easy reading.

Alex has flown to Miami to search for her brother Bill, who's disappeared. Together with Sam Hooker (a Nascar race driver who's looking for Bill because he's stolen Sam's boat), her camp friend Jude and dog Brian, and various large and feisty inhabitants of Little Havana it turns into a hunt for sunken gold and a missing warhead - complete with Cuban baddies and all the daft humour you'd expect (my favourite part possibly being the ingenious use of a spice cookie to elicit information from a captured goon...). Can't wait for the next one.

Storm Front, by Jim Butcher

2006-01-08T14:15:00.000Z

Lost items found. Paranormal Investigations. Consulting. Reasonable rates. No Love Potions, Endless Purses, or Other Entertainment.

This cropped up as one of my recommendations on Amazon based on past purchases, so I thought I'd give it a whirl in the post-Christams book token frenzy.

Harry Dresden is a wizard-for-hire (think Harry Potter grown up and gone a bit seedy). He also acts as consultant to the Chicago Police Dept on their more unearthly cases. Hired by a woman to find a missing item - her husband - and also brought in by the CPD on a case of two people having their hearts torn out apparently by magic, Harry also has to contend with a new drug, ThreeEye, sweeping the city and promising to open up psychic abilities in anyone as well as the threat of his mystical parole officer turning up with a big sword at inopportune moments. Add to this being menaced by demons, vampires and giant scorpions, not to mention gangsters, and it's really turning out not to be his week.

The writing could do with a bit of improving, and I'm hoping over the next few books he finds his own voice more, as a lot of this book felt too similar to a lot of other authors. He does, however, have several nice ideas of his own, particularly the potion making (and the spirit in a skull has potential, even if it does smack of being nicked from Trapdoor). It certainly held my attention, and I'll be seeking out the others - which will hopefully be a little stronger in terms of plot and characterisation.

Sahara, by Cive Cussler

2006-01-08T13:38:00.000Z

Seeing the film of Sahara was what introduced me to Cussler's books, so I've been curious to read this for a while. Initially it's quite a close match (albeit with a certain amount of filmic re-jigging) but about halfway through they part company pretty much completely and I'm glad I saw the film first, because if I'd read the book I'd have gotten all cross and indignant (see also Rebus).

Anyway, this time out Pitt and co are sent up the Niger to track down the source of a deadly red tide that, if it's allowed to spread unchecked, will result in the oceans failing to produce their 70% of the world's oxygen with everyone thereby suffocating horribly. Parallel to this, a team of scientists from the World Health Organisation are investigating mysterious disease outbreaks amongst the desert villages. Oh, and tourists are getting eaten in the process.

The book is a whole lot darker than the film, in a lot of ways. Out to stop anyone discovering the truth of what's behind it all are a French industrialist and the military dictator of Mali - throw into the mix a slave-labour gold mine in the desert full of political prisoners, a desperate escape across hundreds of miles of desert, attack by apparently the entire forces of the Malian army and you've got a rather daft, occasionally very horrid adventure that's very readable. Oh, and what's pretty much nothing but a postscript involving a Confederate Army Ironclad ship discovered in the desert (which is something used to much greater effect in the film I think, but that's probably heresy).

The one thing that jars about these books is the fact that Cussler himself keeps turning up in them to save our heroes from certain death just in the nick of time or pass on some form of vital information or assistance. So far, three for three. It really destroys the suspension of disbelief and reminds you that what you're reading is made up. If for no other reason that they don't remember meeting him from the others, just that he looks 'vaguely familiar'. Having said that, it won't stop me reading them, it's great to have discovered a whole new (and extensive) series to read.

Floodtide, by Clive Cussler

2005-12-30T11:52:00.000Z

Thoroughly recommend this as a stormin' good read (it's better written than Black Wind too, not sure whether that's because BW was by Clive and Dirk Cussler, and this one's just by Clive?).

This time out, Dirk Pitt is up against an evil Chinese shipping magnate, traffiking in illegal immigrants, guns and drugs and up to no good on the Mississippi. It's got car chases, explosions, underwater derring-do, sunken treasure, and the assistance of a beautiful and resourceful (of course) Immigration agent.

"Birds, Beasts & Relatives" and "The Garden of the Gods" by Gerald Durrell

2005-12-16T12:56:00.000Z

Most people are familiar with the book My Family and Other Animals, about Gerald Durrell's idyllic childhood on Corfu in the 1930's - for a start there was a series on TV in the late 80's, and they're doing another programme this Christmas. What fewer people seem to realise is that, feeling there was a wealth of stories as yet unexplored, he wrote two further volumes, Birds, Beasts and Relatives, and Garden of the Gods.

So here we have more stories of the young Gerry, with Mother, Larry, Leslie, Margo and Spiro, just as funny as My Family and often ruder. Whether it's impressions of the myriad animals he was variously watching, catching, rearing or just inflicting on his family, through scenes of Corfiot peasant life to their succession of bizarre houseguests and the various events that befell them, these are hilarious, highly recommended additions to anyone's library.

The Smile Of A Ghost, by Phil Rickman

2005-12-14T11:17:00.000Z

The new Merrily Watkins (Deliverance [exorcism] Consultant to the Diocese of Hereford) mystery, and well worth the wait. Set mainly in Ludlow, it revolves on one hand around a string of deaths at the castle and a mysterious ex-goth singer stalking the town after dark; and on the other about a panel of interfering advisors setting themselves up to control Merrily's Deliverance work. You've got ghosts, hidden family secrets, poison pen letters, misdirection, last minute dashes and a lot of timber framing. All you expect from a Merrily book really. Definitely recommended.

Midwinter of the Spirit, by Phil Rickman
Having been laid up in bed for days with a self-pitying cold, I've also been re-reading the earlier ones. Midwinter Of The Spirit is the second Merrily book, and the first where she's officially the Deliverance Consultant. This is one of the more 'orrible tales, from an evil man's spirit attaching itself to Merrily as she ministers to him dying in the hospital, through weird and tragic happenings on Dinedor Hill above Hereford and desecration of churches, up to the climax in the cathedral during the installation of the Boy Bishop ceremony. All good stuff then.

The Crown of Lights, by Phil Rickman
I think this is my least favourite Merrily book, partly due to some squirmingly uncomfortable scenes, and also, I've realised on re-reading it, because it hasn't got Lol Robinson in it, who I like a lot. Still a good read though, focussing on tensions between a group of Pagans who want to re-dedicate a decomissioned church in the Welsh Borders, and an evangelical minister who's whipping up the locals and media alike. Typically, influences on both sides are not what they seem at first, and the book does a good job of showing how fundamentalism on both sides of the religious fence can spiral into hysteria and violence. There's a sub-plot involving the sinister goings on of the local people, and I presume I first read this pre-League of Gentlemen because it's a lot harder to read bits of it with a straight face now. Still, events build to a pleasing finale, and I think I liked it more on the second read.

The Wind In The Willows, by Kenneth Grahame

2005-12-11T13:52:00.000Z

It's funny really, how you tend to avoid reading 'classics' because you think they're going to be dull. It's like anti-logic, or something. And then you read one, more because you think you should than for any other reason and you're vaguely surprised when it's really good. Odd, really. Happened with Treasure Island too.

Anyway, I'd managed to go nearly 29 years without not only not reading it, but also not seeing any tv/film versions (although I vaguely remember a theatre thing when I was about 7 and Toad definitely sounded like David Jason in my head so I must have got that from somewhere). So there was the added bonus of not knowing the plot, such as it is; it's an episodic little book, each chapter or couple of chapters being pretty much self contained stories in themselves.

Beautifully descriptive (with illustrations by Ernest Shepard who it turns out also did Winnie the Pooh, which I *had* read) and very entertaining, I rather wish I'd got around to it earlier. Still, better late than never I suppose, and if you haven't read it yet, go and do so. Or any other children's classic you've been avoiding, for that matter.

Moondial, by Helen Cresswell

2005-11-30T18:53:00.000Z

Lux et Umbra Vicissim, sed semper Amor - Light and Shadow by turns, but always Love.

This book was turned into a children's tv series in the 80's, which is where I, and probably a lot of other people, first came across it. Got this copy for 20p, which has to be one of the bargains of the year.

Minty (Araminta Cane) is staying with her Aunt in the village of Belton, while her mother is in a coma following a car crash. Drawn to the sundial - or moondial - in the grounds of the big house next door, she discovers it is a link through time, meeting up the kitchen boy Tom and the persecuted and mysterious Sarah in two different periods of history. Threatened by the mysterious Miss Raven, it's a race against time to save the children and pull her mother back from 'moontime'.

I remembered quite a bit of this from the tv series, but what I'd forgotten and really wish I'd found out in time was that Jacqueline Pearce (Servalan from Blakes 7) played Miss Raven. Might have to re-read her bits and imagine them differently.

A recommended, nostalgic, spooky, beautifully descriptive read.

Black Wind, by Clive Cussler

2005-11-28T19:06:00.000Z

Having seen the film Sahara, noticed that it was based on a book by Clive Cussler and further investigation revealing that he'd written loads, I was quite keen to try one. Picked one up second-hand last weekend, and then discovered that it's currently in the top 20 bestseller lists. Nothing like starting a series at the wrong end.

It's not overly well written - a lot of the dialogue feels rather stilted, I think because of his reluctance to use contractions - eg people seem to say 'it is' and 'I am' rather than it's and I'm a lot, and it doesn't feel natural. Descriptions are repeated too much - one of the baddies has deathly cold black eyes, and I know this because it's mentioned almost every time he appears. Summer Pitt gushes a lot (no not like that you smutty minded lot). One of the ships can stop on a dime - several times. Tenses are mucked about with - there's a prologue set in the 2nd World War that switches back and forth between present tense action and past tense historical information.

All that said, it's a ripsnorting adventure on the high seas, and I read it (677 pages) in a week. The plot involves the recovery of Japanese 2nd World War biological weapons from a wrecked submarine by an evil Korean business tycoon (complete with evil mountainside lair) who's going to launch them at a G8 gathering in America from a hijacked rocket. There's a lot of chases and explosions and escapes and wisecracking. It's also possibly the first book I've come across where the author makes a cameo appearance, popping up to do a spot of rescuing.

Highly recommended for a spot of non-taxing adventure. And also for the (presumably) unintentionally hilarious line "His finger was just tightening on the trigger when a loud poof erupted at his feet." Yes, another assassination attempt thwarted by Graham Norton...

The Spirit of the Green Man, by Mary Neasham

2005-11-27T10:22:00.000Z

Published by Green Magic, I bought this in Glastonbury last year, and finally just got round to reading it. One of the best things about it are the full page illustrations by Jane Brideson - and it's worth checking out the colour versions on her website at Dark Moon Designs.

The book itself is more a collection of disparate pieces rather than one continuous text, and I confess to finding some sections hard going where the author started to irritate me - describing a friend who'd picked a bunch of wild garlic in a wood, she writes: "He had a brief and transient attempt at possessing nature whilst nature responded by dying in his hands. I haven't seen him again." Oh please, get over yourself. The other thing that annoyed me at the beginning was her habit of making assertions and immediately following them with "there are, I know, many scientific people who will disagree with me on this" or similar. Look, either research something properly, or if it's the product of meditation/spiritual revelation SAY SO, and have faith in your material, don't just make a statement and then cancel it out with one that comes across as well this is what I think despite all evidence to the contrary.

Sections include origins of the green man, connecting with him through meditation and exercises, the green man's message today, his presence in literature (where the author re-presents some familiar tales in her own way), organisation contacts, and an informative section on individual tree species. It then finishes with a few essays by other writers.

Conclusions then, it is well worth a read, although I'm not sure I'd spend a tenner on it. Borrow it, get it second hand or order it through the library. I'm sure that's the greener alternative anyway!

Cover Her Face, by PD James

2005-11-05T16:14:00.000Z

Another Inspector Dalgliesh mystery, a light little thing of 200 pages. What is in some ways a satisfyingly traditional country house murder mystery, in other ways feels very dated, given that a large part of the plot revolves around the scandal of single mothers. It's an easy enough read, but Dalgliesh is rather incidental to the story, almost more of a background character. The focus is on the suspects, and the point of view moves from one to the other in turn - we mainly encounter the police through their eyes, rather than the other way round. Therefore, there is no sense of a case being unravelled and solved, Dalgliesh just rocks up at the end with the solution, dropping in things he's found out in the meantime, away from the narrative, which leaves you feeling a bit cheated. I prefer the books he's at the heart of to this approach, although he's not the most engaging of detectives at the best of times. Still, it's always good to have found a new series to read and this is a harmless enough way of passing an evening.

A Family Affair, by Rex Stout

2005-11-02T11:33:00.000Z

If I ever had to nominate a list of things for Room 101, people that write in books would be on it. I picked this copy up second-hand, thinking that I hadn't read it before, and it's just as well it transpired that I had, because some of the notes scribbled in the margins would have given it away. Whoever the previous owner was, they'd got to the end confused over the plot, and gone back through underlining and annotating the pointers all the way through. And still to no avail, because the crucial points they thought they'd missed - who provided the key slip of paper and why it was left in the restaurant in the first place - is never actually revealed, which, frankly Mr Stout, is an extremely slack bit of plot device.

Anyway, rant over, what's the book like? This is the last of Rex Stout's Nero Wolfe mysteries, and anyone who likes a good detective story should discover this series. Some people may have seen the TV adaptations which crop up occasionally on BBC2, and they are a very good depiction of the books (also a good excuse for another picture of Timothy Hutton, who plays Archie Goodwin).

In this installment, a waiter from Wolfe's favourite restaurant turns up late at night, convinced someone is trying to kill him. Archie gives him a room for the night so he can speak to Wolfe in the morning, only for a bomb to deny him the opportunity. Incensed that someone was killed in his house, Wolfe goes after the murderer, in a story that involves the events of Watergate and his own arrest - but will he find the killer in time to prevent further deaths?

As the last of the series, and for certain plot reasons, this probably isn't the best book for a newcomer to pick up, but any of the others will do as a starting place, and there are lots to choose from. Heartily recommended.

"Cast A Bright Shadow", by Tanith Lee

2005-11-02T10:47:00.000Z

This hefty book (427 pages), is the first in the planned Lionwolf trilogy. It's a fantasy epic in the style of her much earlier Birthgrave and Storm Lord trilogies, following as it does, the changing fortunes of the main characters amongst the tribes and royalties of an exotic land - in this case an icy arctic wasteland.

Saphay is a minor royal princess, who is to be married off to the chieftain of a northern tribe. However, nothing is as simple as it seems, as palace conniving does not intend her to reach her destination. Attacked by a warband, she escapes but is driven into the frozen ocean, where she encounters a mighty horned whale, and a God...this is one of the three gods, all of double aspect (benign and malign) that were given to her at birth, as custom dictated. They will all feature in the book in their own interfering ways, and this one sires a son on her - he who is Nameless, later to be the Lionwolf. It is he, really, who is the main character here, and the book follows him as he moves amongst the diffferent tribes, forming a huge war band, the Gullahammer, to move against his mother's royal city in revenge for their earlier actions. But there in Ru Karismi, the Magikoy are preparing devastating defences of their own...

The main problem with this book is that the main characters are largely unsympathetic. Their self-obsessed and fatalistic behaviour make it very difficult for you to care what happens to them, especially as half the time they don't seem to either. Coming in a semi-complete circle to the end, while not ending on a cliffhanger (good) it doesn't give any particular sense of satisfaction either, or leave you especially desperate to get the next installment (and Tanith Lee is my favourite author, so that's a shame. I'll get it anyway, mind you).

A better reason than characters or plot to read it then, would be the writing itself, as ever, the world and its peoples are beautifully described and fully imagined. Religions, creatures both natural and supernatural, cities, customs, landscapes, languages - all are vividly painted and explored. Very readable, if not at her most gripping.

"Cue The Easter Bunny", by Liz Evans

2005-10-30T11:48:00.000Z

This is the sixth Grace Smith adventure, and one of the best so far. Grace is a (not overly successful) PI in a seaside resort, and the books read rather like an English Stephanie Plum, only with a darker edge to most of the storylines. This time round, while trying to find out who's sending poison pen letters to the husband of a local soap star and trying to locate a girl who was abducted 14 years ago, Grace has to contend with an overly amorous rabbit, a stalker with a fur fetish, the fact that someone's selling t-shirts round town with a picture of her dressed as the Easter Bunny - oh, and being buried alive...

"Paths Not Taken" by Simon R. Green

2005-10-11T10:45:00.000Z

Yet another Nightside book (and there's another about to be published, he can't half churn them out). Having discovered who and what his mother is, to prevent her destroying the Nightside and bringing about the version of the future that he's seen, John (and Shotgun Suzie) must travel back in time, through various periods in the Nightside's history, right back to its creation. And being who they are, chaos and mayhem will, of course, happily ensue.

This is a great series, and it feels like the story-arc may be wrapped up in the next book - I hope he continues writing them after that. Although, being Simon Green, there's always the worrying possibility that he'll kill everyone off instead. I may have to read the next one through my fingers...

"Thud", by Terry Pratchett

2005-10-10T16:09:00.000Z

The latest in the Discworld series, this installment sees tensions rising in Ankh Morpork between dwarfs and trolls as the anniversary of an ancient battle looms. Vimes has to keep the peace - but he also has to contend with a murder, a missing painting (which is reputed to contain a hidden secret about the battle), a vampire recruit to the Watch, the fact that Sybil is trying to get him to sit for a portrait, and that he needs to be home for 6pm every night without fail to read 'Where's My Cow' to his baby son.

As ever, this book is a great read, although possibly not the funniest of the series - feels at times a little too much like he's trying to crowbar in a Message about war and immigrants and so forth. However, still miles better and cleverer and funnier than any potential rivals.

"Hex And The City", By Simon R. Green

2005-09-27T14:32:00.000Z

"Would I be right in supposing that the bad guys are once again hot on your trail and that I can expect armed invasions, mayhem and bad language at any moment?"

Another in the Nightside series, this book sees John Taylor commissioned to find out the city's origins - who created it, and what was it created for. As he and his typically oddball companions (Madman, Sinner, and Pretty Poison - a succubus demon from Hell) canvas a succession of older and older and more and more dangerous entities, it becomes apparent that not only is the answer mixed up with the mystery of who and what John's mother really is, but that there are people out there who don't want the answers to be found, and they will kill to protect their interests.

This is another very entertaining installment in the series and finally brings together several of the strands that have been running through earlier books (such as who keeps sending the Harrowing after him, and the background of Walker, who represents the Authorities in the Nightside). If you liked the others, you'll like this, although given the nature of the plot, probably not the best one to start reading them on.

"Dr Who - The Stealers of Dreams", by Steve Lyons

2005-09-27T14:30:00.000Z

I fair rattled through these books, I think I read all three in four days, so they can't be bad. This one certainly was back on form, set on an Earth colony where fiction and lies have been banned (the government was the first thing to go). A pirate broadcasting station is fighting back, and the Doctor wants to help, but when Rose starts being stalked by zombies and Jack gets locked up in a mental institution, he begins to realise that here fiction may not be as harmless as it at first seems.

"Dr Who - Only Human", by Gareth Roberts

2005-09-27T14:28:00.000Z

Another of the recent batch based on the new series, this is a bit of an oddity, even by Doctor Who standards. The action (mainly set in prehistoric times and split between cave men, neanderthals, and an incongruous group of genetic experimenters from the future) has a very exaggerated, comic-book feel. Poor old Captain Jack gets exiled into a side story for most of the book, only speaking through a diary, which is a shame as the opening scenes use his character very well. It's a readable enough book, but my least favourite so far, probably because it feels the furthest away from the established feel of the series, both in terms of TV and the novels.

"Doctor Who - The Deviant Strain", by Justin Richards

2005-09-23T14:00:00.000Z

Following the resurgence of the series on telly, BBC books have launched a new line of novels featuring the Doctor (as played by Christopher Ecclestone), Rose and now in the latest three, Captain Jack Harkness.

This book sees them land in present day Russia after answering a distress call, at a scientific/nuclear submarine outpost that has been largely abandoned by the authorities for years. Joined by a team of Russian soldiers investigating the same energy readings, they not only have the suspicious villagers to contend with, but soon find a body that's been drained of life and substance. Soon it's a fight for survival, against ancient and modern threats, against the background of rotting nuclear submarines.

The fourth in the series to be released, this is possibly the best: it was certainly exciting and paced the action very evenly between the three main characters. Recommended.

"Sabriel" by Garth Nix

2005-09-18T09:24:00.000Z

Sabriel, which probably falls into the category of 'Young Adult Fantasy', is a book I'd wanted to read for ages, having seen quite a few good reviews of it. Finally found it in the library last week, and it doesn't disappoint. In feel, it's a bit like Tanith Lee's young adult stuff (such as the Wolf Tower books), and its world and customs are vividly realised.

Sabriel's father is the Abhorsen, a necromancer charged with banishing the troublesome dead beyond the final gates. Sabriel has grown up in a girls school in a separate country, a country more like our own, with cars and electricity, but now her father is missing presumed dead, and she must take up his sword and the bells of his trade and journey into the Old Kingdom to face an ancient evil threatening the land and the countries beyond.

Cracking book, highly recommended.

"Coincidence", by David Ambrose

2005-09-15T11:07:00.000Z

This is an odd book, it starts off quite slowly, gains momentum and interest in the middle, and then flies off into fruitloop territory in the last third. Based on Jung's theory of synchronicity, which relates to seemingly connected events that can have no possible actual connection, it goes further to suggest that by thinking about these coincidences, you can cause them to happen, and the consequences this might have on reality. By the end, the main character has so many questions - who am I, am I really here, are any of us really here, am I going mad - for pages - that you want to slap him, and sadly the book has no answers for the reader either, which leaves you at the end going 'gah!'

Having said all that, it's very readable and worth a look if you're bored and it's raining. Which, lets face it, is quite likely.

"Digital Fortress", Dan Brown

2005-09-11T00:52:00.000Z

Ah yes, Dan the Man's done it again (or possibly first, not quite sure which order he wrote them in). I bought this knowing nothing about the plot, but fully confident as to what the basic structure would be and what I'd be getting. And I feel fully justified in every respect. We have codes to be cracked (cruck?), a beautiful, intelligent and badly written woman, a resourceful and slightly bemused man running about an exotic location, an older mentor figure, a character whose motives are driven by his past and a race against time. Oh yeah, and more opportunity to be shouting the obvious plot twists at the dim characters. Love it. Couldn't put it down. Keep 'em coming Dan.

"The Way Of Wyrd", Brian Bates

2005-09-11T00:40:00.000Z

This book follows a young novice monk as he travels in the land of the Saxons and learns of the ways of Wyrd, the Saxon deities and spirit world from a journeying shaman, Wulf. Beautifully descriptive, it's a shame that Brand is such an annoying protagonist. It's rather like Mythago Wood, in that it's a book full of fascinating detail and philosophical concepts, but one that you keep putting down in exasperation every time the lead character does something else stupid.

Sent by his abbey to travel amongst the Heathens to learn their ways prior to future missionary expeditions, he travels with Wulf to be initiated into the shamanic mysteries. However, due to never doing what he's told, he ends up having his soul stolen by the spirits and having to journey to the underworld in order to win it back. Served him right, if you ask me.

There's a website too, that's worth a look, at Way Of Wyrd

"The Murder Room", PD James

2005-09-02T17:01:00.000Z

The first PD James I read, earlier this year, seems to have been one of her first, whereas this seems to be one of the latest, although in the intervening years Dalgleish hasn't cheered up any. He has acquired lackeys, sorry, a team though, which spreads the action out a bit. This was quite a hefty book, and considering the first murder didn't take place until about a third of the way through, that's a lot of exposition. However, the quality of the writing is such that the action is almost secondary and it's a very good, easy read.

The plot here revolves around the Dupayne Musuem, dedicated to the inter-war years, which has a room dedicated to various true-life murder cases. A series of murders (eventually) ensue, that mirror the events on display - copycat killings or something more entwined with the lives of those involved in the museum? Go on, guess.

"Magic" & "The Magician", WE Butler

2005-08-21T18:16:00.000Z

This is actually two books published by the Aquarian Press in a combined volume - "Magic, Its Ritual, Power & Purpose", and "The Magician, His Training And Work". Originally published in 1952 and 1959 respectively, Butler was not only an ordained priest in the Liberal Catholic Church, but worked closely with Dion Fortune and the Society of the Inner Light and founded the Servants of the Light School of Occult Science. Coming at the time when what might be termed 'modern Pagansim' was only just emerging, and still rooted firmly in the Christian mysteries, the books are nonetheless of enormous value to the modern student of Witchcraft.

The books cover such topics as breathing and relaxation exercises, visualisation and meditation techniques, the Quabbalah, tattvic waves, creation of talismans, building of a 'Magical Personality' - in short, a solid grounding in the theory, psychology and practice of magic, in whatever religious context the reader is working from. While some passages can be quite hard going, the books include invaluably concise explanations of the "why" and "how" of things work which many more recent books omit.

"The Big Over Easy", Jasper Fforde

2005-08-15T20:01:00.000Z

This is the first of Fforde's books not to feature the literary detective Thursday Next, and while functionling very respectably as a stand-alone book, those that have read the four Thursday books (particularly The Well Of Lost Plots) will, I think, get more out of this one in terms of in-jokes, references and general bizarreness.

This book revolves around the Nursery Crime division of the Reading police force, with DI Jack Spratt and DS Mary Mary investigating the death of one Humperdinck Dumpty, from injuries sustained from falling off a wall. Did he jump, was he pushed, and can Mrs Singh the pathologist succeed where all the King's Men failed, in putting the pieces back together again?

Read it. Read the others first if you can. And then explore the huge suite of websites that accompany the books, giving book upgrades, 'making of' wordumentaries and all manner of silliness (quite a lot of which involves dodos).

"The Wine Of Angels", Phil Rickman

2005-08-07T19:13:00.000Z

This is the first book featuring Merrily Watkins, vicar of the village of Ledwardine and, in the rest of the series, diocese exorcist. As the seventh book in the series is due out this year and I've only read them through once, I felt it was time for a refresher. They blend the supernatural - both Pagan and Christian - with more down to earth mysteries, and are well worth a read.

The Wine Of Angels deals with her arrival as Priest-in-charge and build up to her installation as vicar, having to deal with the various tensions at work in the community - a heritage festival is planned and Merrily is caught in the middle of gay rights vs feudal rights, pagan/folkloric influences vs Christian, a missing girl and her own teenage daughter Jane (think "Cybil" set in Herefordshire. With ghosts. Ok, maybe not so much).

Rickman's written several other stand-alone books (all of which I'd recommend), but if you're going to read the Merrily Watkins ones, read this one first, or a lot of the plot won't be a surprise.

"Nightingale's Lament", Simon Green

2005-08-03T19:03:00.000Z

"There are any number of magical creatures, mostly female, whose singing can bring about horror and death. Sirens, undines, banshees, Bananarama tribute bands..."

This is the third book in the Nightside series, and bloody brilliant it is too. The Nightside is a kind of London flipside, where it's always 3am and all manner of nasties are real (if anyone's familiar with Neil Gaiman's Neverwhere, it's a lot like that. In fact probably sue-ably so). John Taylor is a detective with a real private eye - his third eye - that allows him to find things. Unfortunately, if he uses it too much his enemies can track him through it, so there's lots of legwork and good old-fashioned threats and violence.

Simon Green is one of my favourite authors, and these books read a lot like his Hawk and Fisher series - in fact various characters/Gods/demons pop up in both, a lot of Green's work has very loose boundaries between its worlds.

In this book there's a nightclub singer whose sad songs have been making her audience commit suicide, and John has to find out why. It's funny, it's macabre, it's occasionally downright disgusting. Only complaint, no Suzie Shooter in this one (character from the first two. People that know me can probably guess what she's like). Hopefully this series will run and run, and she'll return soon.

"Deception Point", Dan Brown

2005-07-31T11:00:00.000Z

"Men lie."
"Yeah, about sleeping with other women, but never about bioluminescent plankton."

Yes, it's another Dan Brown, this time sans Robert Langdon (although put Michael Tolland in Harris Tweed and Bob's your protagonist).

The main hero here though, is Rachel Sexton and the more of these I read, the more I'm noticing similarity of characters - Sohpie Neveu, Vittoria Vetra, Rachel Sexton - all very different women in the way they are initially described, but all end up acting, speaking, thinking in exactly the same way. Also, is it really necessary for so many characters to have distressing episodes in their past that inform the way they act in the present? Three of them in this one book alone, Dan, mate, people can do stuff without being nearly killed as a kid or having traumatically dead relatives.

Still, it's another rip-roaring adventure, no secret societies this time, instead we get NASA, the US government and mysterious meteorites. Oh and a large dollop of conspiracy and murder for good measure. And sharks. Good stuff.

"Angels And Demons", Dan Brown

2005-07-28T20:58:00.000Z

"For the first time in his life, Langdon wished he were holding a very big gun"

This is the book which comes before the Da Vinci Code, and in it we have more Robert Langdon, more code breaking, more chasing round exotic locations, more conspiracies, ancient secret fraternities and complicated murders, and more help from a cerebral yet gutsy and oddly attractive female companion. Apparently he's writing a third, I suspect we know the drill by now.

Actually, I think this one builds tension better and to a more exciting climax than the Da Vinci Code, although TDVC feels like a better written book in some ways. And again with the blindingly obvious not being twigged soon enough (or am I just naturally suspicious?). Recommended, though, as another book it was difficult to put down.

"Silverfin", Charlie Higson

2005-07-24T00:39:00.000Z

This is the first in a new series of 'Young James Bond' books written by Charlie Higson of the Fast Show/Randall and Hopkirk, and the feel is quite similar to the latter series.

Beginning with James' arrival as an orphan at Eton in the 20's, the first half is largely concerned with school matters and his emerging character, both as the boy of the book and the man he will eventually become. Eventually, however, the action moves to the Scottish Highlands, where dastardly deeds and sinister experiments are most definitely afoot.

There's nice references to the life to come - his uncle advising him against becoming a spy because of the horrors it would entail, his introduction to fast cars, a horse called Martini and a blonde by the name of Wilder Lawless...it never feels forced though, and is a very entertaining easy read (I read it all this morning apart from the first 21 pages). The second one is due out in January 2006 and I'll be picking it up as soon as it appears.

"The Da Vinci Code", Dan Brown

2005-07-23T02:30:00.000Z

When I first heard people banging on about this book, I didn't realise it was actually a novel - what with so many people wibbling on about conspiracy theories and the like, I'd assumed it was some dubious 'historical' book from the likes of Graham Hancock. But no! It's actually a bloody marvellous thriller of the type that you keep picking up to read a bit more of in any spare minutes and fractions of minutes.

It does have its down points, such as vast passages of exposition when the history/myth behind the clues is explained, which tend to lose the feeling of what should actually be conversations between the characters. Also, they take just too damn long to work out some of the clues - you end up bouncing in your seat for pages going 'come, on, come on, it's blindingly obvious' until they twig.

That aside, I definitely recommend it as a yompingly good read. Anyone that's got a passing acquaintence with grail lore and religious/art history perhaps won't find as many revelations as billed, but that just gives you the bonus smug factor.

**Film news**
Oh sweet Jesus, the rumours are true, Tom Hanks is playing Robert Langdon*. Noooooooooooooo! How utterly utterly wrong can you get? The rest of the cast look pretty well matched though [IMDB Listing] Which makes it all the more bizarre.

* Obviously, it should have been Timothy Hutton (above). Why do these people never ask me before making these sorts of decisions?

"Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince", JK Rowling

2005-07-17T20:35:00.000Z

Been trying to work out how long it actually took me to read this; 22 hours from purchase to finish, probably about 12 after factoring in things like eating and sleeping and encouraging the cat to investigate the possibilities of next door's newly turned flowerbed.

Anyway, it's good, I enjoyed it more than the last one, he's stopped with the stroppy and annoying bits. While it doesn't exactly end on a cliffhanger, it's also the book to have the least actually resolved within it - very much a case of 'to be continued'.

Marginally shorter than the Order of the Phoenix, but not by much, the usual suspects are present and correct - quidditch matches, Hagrid and his creatures, the Dursleys, the school and its terms - as well as a new teacher, a new minister and new challenges. A worthy addition to the series.

"Eleven On Top", Janet Evanovich

2005-07-16T19:00:00.000Z

The latest in the Stephanie Plum sequence, in its regular summer appearance, and anyone that's read one before will know exactly what to expect. This is not a bad thing however, as it means exploding cars, glorious sounding food, barmy situations and very very funny writing.

This time round Stephanie's resigned from her job at the Bonds office with the hope of having a normal life. I think we know that's not going to happen, don't we...

Read it. In fact, read the first ten first.

Then go and buy some doughnuts.

"Pompeii", Robert Harris

2005-07-13T22:25:00.000Z

In an odd sort of meaningless coincidence, whereas the previous book has action set in the ruins of Pompeii, this one is set in the town itself over the four days before the eruption. It got given to me in a kind of 'you've got a background in archaeology, you'll like this, it's set in anceint Rome' way. Eh?

It is, however, very good indeed, and follows Marcus Attilius, the aquaduct engineer, as he tries to find out why his water supply is suddenly failing. Shades of Dante's Peak really, with the various signs in the ground and the wildlife building the tension up to what we know's going to happen and they don't.
Each chapter is preceded with extracts from modern scientific publications on the eruption and I can't decide whether they work or are too incongruous a note, breaking the mood of the period.

Other than the chapter notes, a couple of other things jarred - the slaves are generally painted as more reliable, loyal etc than many of the freemen, and our hero is of course terribly decent in his treatment of them - now I'm not saying they wouldn't have been, it just feels a bit like a modern 'ooh, there have to be slaves but we'll make them lovely and treat them well'. Also, while a lot of the populace are running about in 'we must sacrifice a bull to Vulcan' mode, the main protagonists are made to be pretty un-religious in their outlook, which again feels oddly too modern.

Anyway, corrupt officials, murderous villians, nubile heiresses and Pliny the historian all combine to make for a very entertaining book - and it's not just about the big bang, there's a good deal of plot going on for your money.

"The Vesuvius Club", Mark Gatiss

2005-07-11T22:23:00.000Z

"A bit of fluff"

The Vesuvius Club, by Mark Gatiss of the League of Gentleman, and Doctor Who scripting fame, is a romp through Edwardian London and Naples featuring the incorrigible Lucifer Box, portraint painter and secret agent. He needs to find a veiled lady, find a new valet, find a brace of disappearing diplomats, find out who's trying to kill hiim, and find out how to charm the lovely Bella Pok out of her petticoats. Not necessarily in that order.

I can highly recommend this book, I read it in a couple of days and it's just fantastic. It looks like it could be the start of a series and I really hope it is.

http://www.vesuviusclub.com

"Elvis, Jesus and Coca-cola", by Kinky Friedman

2005-07-10T18:11:00.000Z

The cat, of course, said nothing.

Kinky Friedman, late of the Texas Jewboys and the man responsible for the country song "Get your biscuits in the oven and your buns in the bed" writes a good line in detective novels. From his New York loft apartment and helped by his cat, a good supply of espresso and cigars, and a bunch of accompanying misfits (most of whom also appear to be real people), he solves a series of lurid crimes.

Once upon a time Kinky was involved with two women at once - Uptown Judy and Downtown Judy. Now Uptown Judy's missing, a film about Elvis Impersonators made by a dead man is missing and it looks like the Mob have had a hand in both. Can Kinky, Downtown Judy and the rest of the Village Irregulars keep ahead of the cops, the Mob and their own ennui and avoid being set in concrete cowboy boots?

Although there can be a rather dark mood to these books at times which means they're not everyone's cup of tea, they're frequently laugh-out-loud funny and eminently readable. Ideal books for coffee drinking cat lovers with a slightly twisted sense of humour...

"Anno Dracula", by Kim Newman

2005-07-07T02:00:00.000Z

Thanks to James for the first entry, as he thrust Anno Dracula upon me a few weeks back. Took me a while to brave it, being a hefty 461 pages long, but once I did I was hooked from the first.

Set in an alternative London where Dracula has married Queen Victoria, and the streets are populated with such people as Lestrade, Raffles and Dr Jekyll; Jack the Ripper is murdering a series of vampire prostitutes, and it's down to Charles Beauregard, a member of the Diogenes Club, and Geneveive, a vampire older than Dracula himself to untangle the gory mystery.

A book to really get your teeth into...

B(ook)log

2005-07-07T01:30:00.000Z

In September 1990, mid-GCSE, our English teacher made us start keeping a list of what we were reading in the back of an exercise book: title, author, date finished etc. Three months later she looked through them - I'd filled two and a half pages, earning me an "excellent" and two exclamation marks. I wonder what she'd make of it today - I kept that list going, and since 11th September 1990 have read 1087 books.

I've also nearly run out of room in the original exercise book, which made me think of keeping an online list of things that I've read. A plus point being, if I hit a dry spell, there's a rather long list of back-catalogue to work through....